Panikkar- Christ, My Istadevata

Most of the excerpt from Panikkar on the "I" and "Thou" is metaphysically esoteric, difficult to intellectually grasp; and the subtle mystical experience of transformative awareness or sapiential awakening I have been experiencing through CP of Paul's experience "when he confesses, “It is no longer I who live now, but Christ who lives in me!” (Gal 2:20)" is difficult to express in words. But I was deeply touched by Panikkar's statement,

“Yet, in moments of difficulty, suffering, and testing in my life, I was led spontaneously to invoke You, Father, Divinity – and even more frequently, Christ, my istadevata.”

I also found the glossary definition of "istadevata" in the back of the book helpful-

"Icon of the divine which best corresponds to every person's culture, idiosyncrasies, and circumstances; the concrete symbol through which we experience the ultimate mystery that many call "God."

And his footnote- "An istadevata is the most human way of carrying us close to this experience. We need to find the divine icon with which we can communicate."

Jesus The Christ is my istadevata; but I am discovering that The Christ and the experience of Christ within me (and others) is much bigger than the little portrait I have known.

"The you that I am (and not the me) is Christ’s dwelling in the deepest center of my being."

-Aidan+