Collision of Opposite's

I've been reading "The Naked Now-Learning to See as The Mystics See" by Fr Richard Rohr.

One place I connected with was Rohr's comments on "collision of opposites" and being "a values conservative and a process liberal;" and a correspondent's comment of having "more in common with my buddhist friends than childhood friends who have converted into the christian traditions."

I grew up as a fourth generation pentecostal and evangelical/fundamentalist. I really tried to fit into the more ecstatic/shamanistic approach to God in this way but never really made the connection, though I did have at times more subtle religious experiences within that context. Even as a child I was drawn to the spirituality exemplified in David Carradine's portrayal of Qui Chang Kang, the Shaolin Buddhist Monk in the TV classic Kung Fu. I started reading Brue Lee's Tao of Jeet Kun Do and Lao Tzo's tao Te Ching, etc., and began intuitively integrating those teaching into my Christian framework and spirituality. Later I was drawn to the catholic/liturgical/sacramental view of transcendence, mystery, and transformation, especially in Eastern Orthodox writings, saints, and mysticism, such as praying the Jesus Prayer both as a perpetual mantra and contemplatively according to the breath or heart beat.

I'd already immersed myself in the writings of Eastern Orthodoxy and western mystics like St. John of the Cross to Thomas Merton. Yet, even though deeply drawn to ancient Christian mystical tradition, these experiences seemed so far removed from my own experience, reserved only for Saints who had already been divinized. Even the "how to" manuals of the philokalia seemd just too difficult and lofty to be within my reach.

That began to change about ten years ago when I stumbled onto the writings of Father's Basil Pennington and Thomas Keating and John Main. These men presented me with a gift, a simple paradigm for understanding and experiencing for myself, little by little, what all those sages, saints and mystics had been writing about. I started to get it. A light went on and I began to awaken to the reality that I could begin, even now, to enter into those experiences of the saints, that they weren't so far removed after all.

Together with this new understanding, my own practise of Centering Prayer, and the teaching of such other mystics like Dom Bede Griffiths and Brother Wayne Teasdale (and now I think Richard Rohr) my world view of Christ (the Cosmic Christ), the world and spirituality, etc., has been expanding, pushing the old boundary markers further and further out. Levels of intellectual and experiential awarness and states and stages of consciousness growing in expanding concentric circles of growth and understanding.

Its been rather frightening at times. There's been subtle and not so subtle shifts of consciousness, awareness, and spiritual polarity. I've found myself having more in common with practioners of Buddha or Yoga (not in regard to theology but in regard to technique, method, psychology of dealing with the inner life, and at the level of the journey of experience) than most of my Christian friends who don't seem as interested in the contemplative expression of Christ and the Gospel, etc.

Although I hold to traditional Christian beliefs and values, I find that my reasons for it now have more to do with a holistic approach to life and integration and transformation as found in the Teachings of Jesus; and although I might hold to certain values along with "conservatives" my reasons, awareness and attitudes are no longer the same, or at least they are changing. I am growing more uncomfortable with the underlying attitudes of certain conservative stances of criticism, judgementalism, hatred, separation and exclusivity and finding that even if I am in opposition to certain more liberal views, I am closer to being on the same footing spiritually, at the level of the heart with some who would identify as liberals! (Again, this is not in regard to doctrines but on the level of a genuine Christian inclusivity as taught by Jesus. This doesn't mean an abandoning of traditional values but a change of heart in how those values and beliefs are experienced and expressed in our relationships with people). Terrifying stuff! A Collision of Opposites!

I'm not certain of what it all means. I know there are boundaries that I'm not willing to cross or go beyond. But the more I study the Church Fathers, Saints and Mystics; together with my own spiritual practise of prayer and meditation, the more I realize the boundaries of what Christ accomplished has much greater horizons than I ever realized. I am experiencing a change of heart and awareness through my practise, a letting go of things and expansion of heart and consciousness. I may still struggle with certain areas of my life, my vices, but there is at the same time all of these changes. Its scary (to let go of things or simpy awaken to the realization that my heart has changed without any conscious decision), yet is also exciting.

Well, I suppose I could ramble on and on. (My sons swear I could preach spontaneously for over an hour about anything, even something as random as a potatoe chip! lol.) But I'll sign off with these few thoughts.

Blessings,

Fr Aidan+